Telling Tales – The Sky is Falling! The Sky is Falling!

Wednesday, January 13, 2010

When school was called off for Thursday and it was only Wednesday afternoon (before the first snowflake made an appearance), I knew it was time to fly into action and buy up all the provisions my family would need to make it through the night and up until at least 10 am the following day.

I was one of those. And before you ask yourself, “one of whom?” I know you were there too. We probably passed each other in the bare bread isle. Trying to act like we were there for our routine grocery stop and this trip had nothing to do with the impending ONE INCH OF SNOW predicted to fall on our fine county. Don’t be coy. I know I wasn’t the only one pointing and laughing at everyone else as I loaded my cart with enough toilet paper to satisfy every bathroom stall at LP Field during playoffs.

So I get home with all the items one needs in an emergency, like a dusting of snow. You know the usual; milk, eggs, bread, brownies, People Magazine, potato chips and a gross of Hershey candy bars. After unloading the car with all my loot my husband says, “You’re kidding right. Why on earth did you buy 2 cases of toilet paper? We will never drink all that milk before it goes out of date.” As soon as he shows his lack of appreciation I add his name to the list I have going in my head of people I will charge to have one of my candy bars during a famine. I’ll give you a hint of another person who didn’t stock up and who would be calling me when their supply of Charmin runs out. Her name sounds like Paingel.

Thursday morning we wake up to… NOTHING! Facebook is a flurry of activity. While some folks post how excited they are to have a day off with their kids, others are offering a bounty on the heads of local meteorologists and cash incentives if you have their home addresses. Something about dropping the kids off at their houses since they’re the dopes that encouraged school officials to call off school. I’m indifferent. I’m not mad at the weather people because hey, I’m home with plenty of chocolate and toilet paper and that’s always a good thing. 

Right about the time I get ready to make my way out of the house to get a few errands done in town something happens. Small, uniquely shaped, frozen puffs of condensation start accumulating on the ground…The 10 degree ground. It looked like the meteorologists weren’t that far off on their prediction and we were going to be stuck inside for a while.

I turned my minivan around in the middle of the driveway and pulled back into the garage. When I walked back in the door my youngest screams from the bathroom, “Mom we’re out of toilet paper.” I predict a long weekend with lots of whining and I don’t even need Doppler Radar for that.

You can reach Becky Andrews at becky@wilsonlivingmagazine.com

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